The Real Reason Your Homeschool Isn't Working

Before we start, let me say this: Not every season requires you to be perfect.

Sometimes you're just trying to survive. Maybe you just had a baby. Maybe you're sick. Maybe life is genuinely hard right now. If that's you, it's okay to just get through the day. Your job is to rest and heal, not to do everything perfectly.

But what if you're past that survival time and you're still stuck?
What if you scroll your phone more than you teach?
What if you plan more than you actually do? What if you make more excuses than progress?

Then keep reading.
We need to talk about something hard: Sometimes the biggest problem in your homeschool is you.

When "Good Enough" Really Isn't

Here's what it looks like when you're just coasting:

Your kids read... sometimes. Math happens... maybe.

You're sitting there, but your mind is somewhere else. And you're hoping your kids will just learn somehow without you really teaching.

It doesn't work that way.

When you're inconsistent, your kids become inconsistent. When you don't hold yourself accountable, they won't either. When you drift through the day, everyone drifts with you.

You don't need more books or programs. You need to lead yourself better.

Here's the truth: You set the tone in your home.

When you step up, everyone steps up with you. When you coast, everyone coasts. Until you stop blaming things outside yourself—the mess, the toddler, the "wrong" curriculum—nothing will change.

It Starts with One Choice

Big changes don't need big plans. They start with one decision and then doing it over and over.

Think about moments that changed your life.

Maybe someone said something that made you think differently.

Maybe you read something that opened your eyes. Sometimes we just need someone to tell us the truth we've been avoiding.

The turning point isn't learning more. It's doing what you already know you should do.

Every homeschool mom you admire made that choice.

They said, "No more waiting. No more excuses. I'm starting today."

That choice is waiting for you right now.

Your Life Teaches More Than Any Book

Here's what most homeschool moms forget: Your kids learn more from watching you than from any textbook.

They don't need you to be perfect. They need you to try hard and not give up.

When they see you choose to do hard things instead of easy things, they learn what matters.

When they watch you follow through even when you don't feel like it, they learn to keep promises.

When they see you tackle difficult tasks, they learn to be brave.

Teaching yourself discipline isn't selfish. It's the best lesson you can give your kids.

Think about a normal Monday. Your kids are watching:

• Do you keep your promises to yourself or do you constantly change your mind?

• Do you do the hard stuff first or put it off?

• Do you finish what you start or leave things half-done?

• Do you blame others or take responsibility?

These everyday moments shape who your kids become. They're more powerful than any formal lesson.

Small Steps Create Big Changes

Many mothers fall into the trap of trying to overhaul their entire homeschool in one weekend.
They make big plans, change everything and feel hopeful for a moment.
But by midweek, that energy is gone, and the cycle repeats.

There is a gentler way.

Choose one win at a time.
Get out of bed when you said you would.
Start the first lesson before checking your phone.
Read aloud even if you are tired.
Clean the table so tomorrow starts easier.

These small actions seem insignificant, but they create a powerful ripple effect.
Slowly, your confidence comes back.
Your home becomes steadier.
Your children feel more anchored.

You do not need a complete transformation today.
You just need to begin with the next right step.

Be Honest About What's Really Happening

You can't fix what you won't admit. So let's be honest:

• Saying "I'll start Monday" every single week

• Calling it "unschooling" when really you're just not doing school

• Not teaching because you "can't deal with it today"

• Spending hours looking at homeschool ideas online but never actually doing them

• Blaming your kids for fighting you instead of looking at your own inconsistency

• Calling phone scrolling "research"

This isn't about feeling bad. It's about seeing clearly. Laziness pretends to be real problems. Once you call it what it is, you can fix it.

And when you do? Things will start moving forward fast.

Rules Give You Freedom

Here's something that sounds backward but is true: Having discipline doesn't take away your life, it gives your life back to you.

The more structure your days have, the more peace comes into your home. Not perfection—peace. Not being too strict—being reliable.

When you stop doing what you feel like and start doing what you planned, everything changes:

• Your kids feel safe because they know what to expect

• Your home runs smoothly because you have systems instead of scrambling

• Your energy goes toward good things instead of always putting out fires

Discipline isn't the hard part. Chaos is. 

Structure lets you actually enjoy your kids instead of always feeling behind.

Make Your Decision

At some point, you have to get tired of your own excuses.

Nobody is coming to save your homeschool. No perfect curriculum will fix your discipline problem. No planner will overcome your lack of follow-through.

The change has to come from you.

You need to decide: No more coasting. No more blaming. No more quitting on what matters.

Once you really decide—truly decide—you become the kind of mom your kids can trust and follow.

You don't need permission. You need a decision.

Just Do It

We need homeschool moms who stop talking and start doing.

Want to give your kids a great education? Do it.

Want to build something you're proud of? Do it.

Want to raise kids who are ready for real life? Do it.

There's so much talk in homeschool groups. So many plans and opinions. But what we need are moms who actually do the work.

"But I'm not naturally organized." Do it anyway.

"But I've tried before and failed." Try again. Do it.

"But my kids fight me on everything." Do it anyway.

"But I don't feel like I know enough." Do it.

"But I'm so far behind." Start today. Do it.

What's different between homeschool moms who succeed and those who don't? The successful ones do it. They do it again and again until the job is done.

And then they look back with pride—not because everything was perfect, but because they didn't quit. They didn't settle. They gave their kids something real and valuable.

Your Turn

You don't need a new plan. You need a new standard for yourself.

So here's my question: What's the next right thing you're going to do?

Not tomorrow. Not Monday. Right now.

You can do this. But only if you start.

So stop reading and go do it.

🛠️ Tools & Resources

Guerber History Series
Updated Christian history series by Christine Miller, adapted from H.A. Guerber’s classics. It is ideal for teaching history through engaging, story-based lessons.

StudyPad (Splash Math)
Turn math into fun with adaptive online lessons and games designed to fit each child’s pace—ideal for building skills and confidence.

Little Monsters Universe
Inspire early learners with hands-on science videos and unit studies that make exploring the world exciting and easy for PreK–2 homeschoolers.

Abeka Science: Order & Design
Engage middle schoolers in science through interactive lessons, colorful visuals, and real-world experiments that make complex topics easy to grasp.

Art Class Video Series
Learn drawing fundamentals with Pat Knepley’s engaging art videos—covering perspective, shading, and more for students ages 6 and up.

🧠 Food for thought

We wonder why it's so hard to trust children with their own learning, their own choices, their own knowing. The answer lives in our own story. We were never trusted either. When we were young, adults corrected our instincts, questioned our feelings, told us we were wrong about what we knew to be true. We learned to doubt ourselves before anyone else could.

John Holt said it clearly: "To trust children we must first learn to trust ourselves...and most of us were taught as children that we could not be trusted."

This doubt became our lens. We see children not as capable beings but as people who need constant correction. The cycle continues because we forgot how to trust our own inner compass. Breaking it starts with reclaiming what we lost. Trust yourself first. Then watch how naturally you can trust them.